Update

Hi Everyone


So sorry that I haven't updated recently. I can barely keep up with all of my documentation needs let alone the blog.

Since the last update, I attended the AMTA national conference in Atlanta and had a lovely time. I learned a lot, went to a bunch of meetings, and I even met Ben Folds, briefly. When I got back I had to hit the ground running for another musical, thanksgiving and regular sessions at the school.

Everything is going well. Everyday brings some sort of small miracles.
One of my mentors said that she loves being a music therapist because music therapy is the place for miracles. Miracle meaning something unexpected and wonderful. As a music therapist, she provides opportunities and the space for miracles to happen. I really liked that. Some days definitely feel miraculous. It feels like things are blossoming at the school as more and more teachers, staff and therapists are taking the time to talk to me..... or about me. All of it has been positive. My contract is up in a few weeks at which time we will be renegotiating. Right now it seems positive. I keep on getting emails about presentations and/or meetings, so I take that as a great sign too.

Every kid is a bit like a puzzle and I love trying to put some of the pieces together. I can't say enough how much I love working there. I am excited for the new year and continuing my work there.



Personally, I'm in the middle of a run of Disney's Tarzan. The last two shows I played - Little Shop of Horrors and now Tarzan--- have been some of the most wonderful and fun experiences. Especially Tarzan. The production is so beautiful, intricate, ambitious and artistic. The music is incredibly fun to play- I have a new appreciation for Phil Collins as a result. And the people I get to play with are incredibly gifted. I feel so lucky to be a small part of what makes this particular show go on. It makes me feel like I'm apart of something so special and I love that. One more weekend of shows, one more busy weekend of work and I will be done for the year and what a year it's been.

Starting My Full Schedule

After returning from retreat, the catch-up aspect has been brutal. Normally I'd have a little more time to be on top of all of my stuff, but I've been playing a show (which closes tomorrow). Complete with leaving for Conference next week AND Thanksgiving, I have to get many of my work days out of the way before the holiday. Oy.

Today has been productive. I have had the time to sit down at the Starbucks (Not having to drive back and forth increases the amount of time I have to be productive) and catch up on documentation on my first FULL week at the school. Phew. What a ride. Spending months meeting with people and planning this program has been completely worth it. I love what I do and I hope that the relationship can continue to grow.

Music Therapy story of the Week:

I had a lot of "first sessions" this week. One of my clients is one of those kids that people are concerned about. He's going through a tough transition that has been difficult. 

He's originally been scheduled to come to music with peers in the morning. I didn't think anything of it because I knew that the transition has been tough. To my surprise he came in a few minutes after the group was over with just his one on one aide. He immediately sat at the piano and began to play- he was calm and focused. He played for about 10 minutes. He filled in predictable spaces at the ends of phrases either by playing or completing a phrase. He smiled and even laughed a bit. I found out later that this particular morning had been a difficult morning which is why he didn't come to the group. 

I was sort of shocked to hear  this, although I know in my heart that music often works in this way. :) It was an amazing session!!

Later, the Executive Director found me later and said, "I heard you had a great session this morning." I told him a little bit about it and we both basically called it another victory for music. :) 

Tonight brings the second to the last show of Little Shop of Horrors. I will miss my boys in the pit. Its becoming more and more usual for me to be the only girl (or "chick" as my boys would say) in the pit. My favorite is to try and say things totally unexpected (and often inappropriate) to shock them. I usually succeed. I've really enjoyed getting back into playing shows- it makes me feel in community and happy. We are a little family back there--- albeit, a highly dysfunctional one. That makes me laugh out loud. 

I'm also grabbing dinner with my senior leader (from the recent retreat) tonight before the show-- I think she is even coming to see the show. She also makes me laugh out loud and should make for an interesting evening, one that I am really looking forward to. I like it when fun and sometimes unexpected things happen. 

Signing off from Starbucks! 

Retreat Wrap-Up

I am exhausted, but oh so happy. I am back from retreat again- the same retreat I had the opportunity to lead last year.
This yeas was equally amazing- maybe even more so.
The student leaders (the seniors) were absolutely incredible. The junior retreatants were there for all the right reasons. They were open and honest and started right out of the gate. And it just kept going and going.
The senior leader I was paired with was a gifted leader and wonderful person. We clicked right away and immediately dubbed ourselves The Dream Team and sometimes Double Trouble.... depending on the situation.
The talk I gave went well.
Everyone was wonderful- it was just what I needed.

And now I am tired and have to catch up on what I missed while I was off the grid.

I promise to update more frequently now, as a lot of is happening, like conference, another show and stuff. :) I will try to keep on top of things.... when I've gotten a little more sleep.

Happy Halloween

Today I am dressed up like someone who has the day off. :)

I'm in the middle of quite of a few projects - collecting proposals for my regional responsibilities, another show, an upcoming high school retreat, and upcoming music therapy conference. I am busy. On top of that, I am about to start my full schedule at the school.

The biggest news is that I have now become a LLC- officially. I've been hard at work with Dad to set up my bank accounts and government paper work. Its tough to get things set up and its been completely overwhelming, but worth it. Every time something gets ironed out, I feel more and more relieved. So I'm working on it. You can visit the new site:
www.lfbmusictherapy.com

(Constructive) Feedback is always welcome.

 I just got word that I am to start my regular schedule at the school on Wednesday. That includes 3 groups and 2 individuals. Thursday is a couple of sessions at the early intervention program and two individuals back at the school. Boy will I be tired by the time I get to the high school retreat! As always, I'm looking forward to it. I'm not doing anything that I don't want to be doing and I do like to keep busy.

I spoke to my friend Tim this morning. Tim is a master motivator, coach, therapist, parent, friend. He said that he works best like a top. A top works best when it spins fast- it gets wobbly when its slow. He puts out his best work when he's moving at his top-like pace. I think that sums it up pretty well for me too. So I'll keep spinning and moving forward.

For now, I am celebrating the spooky holiday by watching Arsenic and Old Lace as I prep for my week!
Have a wonderful Halloween!

Tic(k) Tock

I woke up with a strange eye tic this morning. I'm trying to get rid of it with coffee.

Yesterday I assessed a new client. Do you ever have days where you feel like you have no idea what you're doing? That was a little bit of yesterday. This new client is like no one I have ever worked with before... so I felt a little at a loss for a while. I have another assessment session coming up and I think I am more prepared for it.

Today I plan to start writing that report and shoe shopping. Two very important things. :)

Thursday

I've decided that I love being at the school. The people there: students, staff, teachers, therapists, administrators are all wonderful. I am really enjoying myself so far.

Today I have one session over there and then I am off to assess a new client through some contract work. This will be my first big formal assessment since my internship. I am looking forward to it, but also  a little nervous. There's just no way of knowing what its going to be like until I get there. So maybe I'm prepared. I had planned to do a little more preparation yesterday but I got sidetracked by other things.

Things are picking up in pace over here between work, the show that I'm playing in a couple of weeks and regional responsibilities. But it still feels fun and doesn't feel stressful.

I'm going to get going here this morning. Happy Thursday!

Moving Right Along

Things are moving right along over here.

High School Musical:
If you've ever started a program anywhere or had the experience of juggling schedules, then I salute you. Getting a schedule was quite possibly the most difficult part of this whole process. There are only a certain number of hours that I am on campus + kids schedules + other therapies + room availability = Crazy. But we got it done. Now I'm just waiting for my paperwork to clear and I can really start in on this schedule. Its an ambitious schedule and I'm seeing a ton of kids - although I still feel like I need more time every week. :)
I also submitted my first invoice to them today. Yippee!


Office Space:
I had a meeting with a speech therapist in the town just north of here. I found this SLP online in a random search. The website said part of the therapy program includes music, so naturally I sent her an email to find more information. The SLP wrote back right away saying that they've been searching for a music therapist in the area and would I be interested in meeting.

The meeting was interesting. I left not quite knowing what happened, but I felt that it was good. I shared a little video tape, talked about my training and the types of clients I see. Then they asked for a stack of business cards because they really feel like some of the kids they see need music. SOOOOoooo maybe I'll get a few referrals out of that?
Then the SLP basically said that if I wanted to use the office space there one or two days a week when they aren't there that we could probably work something out. But nothing was final... soooo I'm not quite sure. But it seemed positive. Wouldn't that be nice.

The more books, instruments and stuff I acquire, the more I feel like I will eventually need a separate office space. Julie says I should take my sister's room as my office. I seem to recall my sister using my room as her den for a while.

I laughed to myself out loud while cleverly pasting my head on these characters.



Um Yay- Best Friend is coming home for a short visit in a couple of weeks! And today is definitely a work from home in my comfies while taking care of regional business and business business.
Happy Friday!

Day 1 on the job

I am exhausted.
I observed in all of the classrooms today, taking special note of the students who were referred for my services. I got a chance to see them in the classroom and even meet a few for reals.

Each kid is sort of a puzzle and I wish I would work with all of them so I could try and figure them out. It was a great day. The teachers and the aides are starting to remember my name and welcomed me into their classrooms today.

I think I'm going to like it there. :)

Twas the night before School

I'll keep it brief tonight as it IS a school night.

Yep, I have my first day of observation at the school tomorrow. I have a jam packed day of observing, with some time left to get some questions answered and work on my schedule there. I think the hardest part of this process has been trying to figure out who to see and when. Scheduling is a bit of a logistical nightmare, especially when adding in a new service to the list of services already provided. We'll see how it goes. I know this is going to be a big learning-as-I-go experience.

I keep telling myself tomorrow will be fine, but I can't help but be a little nervous. I just don't know what to expect.... and you'd think that I'd be used to the feeling by now. Not so much. But what can ya do. I wouldn't be there if they didn't think I was the right person for the facility. So for now I've organized myself, packed my bag, have my melatonin ready to go (so that I get enough sleep tonight) and laid my clothes out for tomorrow. I'm probably as ready as I will ever be. :)

Its a little strange to think about what I was doing this time last year. I want to say that I spent most of my time napping. A lot has changed and I've had a variety of experiences, for which I am grateful. I kind of feel like a new chapter is starting up right about now. Thank you all you readers for sticking with me and for continuing to support me.
Good night!

It's Friday Night...

I am fast at work on my program. Yesterday I met with a speech therapist from the school to go over a stack of referrals for music therapy. There are too many referrals than I have time for in the week- which is good and bad. It shows the interest and 'need' for this type of therapy but at the same time, we have to make some decisions on who I have time to see during the week. Its pretty difficult and it was a ton of information to go through in one sitting. It did make me more excited to start seeing this pieces come together.

In an interesting turn of events, just as I was "whining" (as my colorado friend would say) about not having another contract to fill out my schedule, I stumbled upon a potentially new opportunity. I found a speech therapist just a few miles up the road that says she incorporates music into her treatments. The website didn't mention music therapy, so I decided to send her an email for more information. She wrote back immediately saying that she's been looking for a music therapist in the area. To cut a long story short, she asked if I'd be interested in meeting.

It looks like we'll be meeting in the next couple of weeks. I don't know if it means another contract or consulting type of opportunity, but I'll take it. And the more people that know I'm here, the more I can get my network working for me. <---- see what I did there? Network--- working.

Lots of things are in motion. Piano lessons started again, this time with a new student, a new very enthusiastic student who likes to strike deals. We negotiated this week on practice time, for example, if for every time she practices "Red Balloons" she has to practice this other song (that she dislikes) 2 times..... or for every X number of stickers, she gets a reese's piece peanut butter cup. That was Lesson #1. She cracks me up. We'll see how the next week goes.

And I'm off to see a friend's band out at a local winery tonight. I'm excited to see them play.

Contract

I got my contract for the school today!
Its official and I'm already hard at work conceptualizing the program. I love working with the education director. She has a great vision for my program as well as the therapy department. For now there's a lot of work and not a long of time. The contract is for the next few months which will allow everyone to see how the program is going at that time and if the relationship is working.... oh yeah and also funding.

Personally, I'm getting a little tired. My friends are finding full time positions with benefits and I feel like I'm lagging behind... in a private practice... which was not originally what I wanted to do out of internship. But now that I'm here, for now, I really want another contract to fill out my schedule.

I had a great conversation with my friend (my colorado friend) this afternoon about where I "could" and "should" be. I don't really like to "should" all over myself. She is in a private practice model and said that it takes about two years to figure things out and build a network. She now has more work than she knows what to do with. I'm not sure I accept that and I'm pretty convinced that I can cut that time down. ;) I guess I really want to focus on celebrating that I'm in a totally different place than when I came home from internship a year ago... and that I have a new contract that was built from a hunch and a cover letter. Go me! Sometimes it's hard to focus on that.

I am off to celebrate!

Pacing

I did 3 miles yesterday on a jog-walk (mostly jog, I'd say). Dad was going really slow on his bike, we did half the levi and I went home while he went on his usual route. It felt pretty good and I can even move my legs this morning. I'd call that a success.

What I realized while I was running with Dad trailing at a snails pace behind (he was a good sport) that I have trouble pacing myself when I run. I go a lot faster than I need to and get tired quickly. I didn't realize that running style completely summed up other areas of life. Go figure. Anyhow, we shared a good laugh over that. Pacing and Balance. Two things that don't go away apparently.

I had a session yesterday with some older adults. One of my favorite things is when we sing old familiar songs and some of the ladies break out in harmony.

I'm still waiting on the contract from the school- there must have been a mail glitch (I'm hoping). I am looking forward to creating a program. There are so many possibilities to create programming but I don't know how the program will look until we really get started. The best news is that I don't have tuberculosis. I had to get a TB test for the school. Next stop, fingerprinting.

Tomorrow, Tomorrow

Tomorrow I get a first look at a contract with the school. And present on the referral process.

I spent way too much time at Staples today trying to make sure my little referral forms were perfect. It came close. Lets just say, I got my copies and have plenty of extras, just in case. I'm most excited about buying a new journal. I've been keeping a journal for my music therapy days so I can keep accurate anecdotal notes and process things that happen through my writing. During my internship, I found that writing absolutely helps me.
I've been terribly consistent, journaling and taking notes after every session and sometimes in between if something is weighing on my mind and heart. It feels pretty good to have it as apart of my routine and process.

I've kept a journal since my very first meeting at this school. This is what I wrote back in February " My hope for the meeting was to score an inservice. At the end of the meeting, I landed 2...." later in the entry I outlined my perfect ideal program. It didn't exactly happen as I planned in my ideal world, but I think its a great start and there is a lot of potential for growth in the way the program is currently planned. Tomorrow marks a new chapter from just meeting and hoping, to fingerprinting and contract signing. Was that a jinx? I hope I didn't just jinx it. :)

Updates tomorrow afternoon.

Also, I'm in full-fledged thinking mode about officially starting my private practice. Business name suggestions are fully welcome.

Sunday Work-Day

I had my usual Sunday schedule today. My sessions went well, except that I developed a mysterious sore throat before my last session.
Anyhow, in my second session, the first thing one of my clients said was "Today is September 11th." I guess I didn't really consider that some of my clients would be affected (effected?) by 9/11. I was a little surprised. My own feelings aside, I wanted to be sure to address this since my client did readily bring it up.

It felt a little bit awkward to me.  I feel a little detached because I don't have a huge emotional recollection of that particular day... even though logically I know that it changed everything. With that said, I sympathize with and respect those that were greatly affected and who still grieve. So it was important that I be able to put all that aside to talk with my client about it. We talked about what happened and how he wanted to proceed in music. Afterwards we sang some patriotic songs.


Tonight N and I are sharing a pizza and watching the Addams Family movie. We took a vote- Angelica Huston was the best Morticia. I was just corrected by N- the only Morticia.

I had a lovely conversation with a colleague/mentor today. Lately, I've been in denial about being in private practice. But... really because I am working off of contracts, I am already in private practice without having planned it or intended it. Shoot. I was advised that I can either get out of the water - you know da-nile- and get to it, or I can float for a limited and preset amount of time (ex. 19 days). I told my mentor that I chose the topless nile rowers for a few more days, maybe weeks. :) She said that was okay- but eventually I'll have to get out of the water. I adore her and I'm glad I got to chat with her.

Hope everyone had a nice weekend. I have a few more sessions tomorrow and then give my first instructional inservice at the school this week. We are mere steps away from signing a contract!

Polar Opposites

Today was opposites day I guess.

I expected my first session to be a "run of the mill" session- as "usual" as any session can get. Instead it was a little chaotic. Well a lot chaotic. There was a really interesting energy happening in the room today. There were a few tantrums and thrown drums and mallets and spilled water.. but some really beautiful moments of interaction in music. You forget about the craziness afterwards and remember the productive stuff.

My second session was mellow and ran itself. The music did it for me. I'm glad it did. I was worried most that I wasn't going to have a solid plan. It turned out well.

There's a theme in all of my little journal entries - I have my own little music therapy journal that I use for before and after sessions. Anyhow the theme is always, "well that went better than expected." I think by now, I should be a lot better at trusting myself and my skills. I'm working on it.

I am putting my labor aside for the weekend and celebrating with a little weekend trip with Peaches & friends.
Happy Labor Day Weekend!

An organic experience

I saw my usual Sunday clientele this weekend, with a few variations for scheduling issues. But I saw one of my morning sessions in the afternoon. I've been trying to figure out what to do differently and trying to create some new experiences to address his goals lately. I probably don't plan for sessions as much as I should. I do like things to be sort of an organic experience, although I realize that some things need more structure.

On Sunday, I had sort of a clinical intuition moment and grabbed a drum for this client. He started going to town on that thing- which isn't the exact phrasing in the plan... but you get the general idea. He drummed in a way that I'd never seen, even after his mother mentioned that he was having sort of an off day. I wonder how its all connected. In the moment, I tried to elicit more response and encouragement to use both of his hands through a piano improvisation.

I also had a woman explain to me last week that the music makes her anxiety decrease.

Today a position came up for a recreation therapist at the VA in this area. After much whining and talking about it, Ty kicked me into gear and I filled out an application. I'm not expecting anything from it, but it was a good experience to fill it out. If I ever need to do that again, I will be prepared and not scared and not whiny. :) Poor Ty, I stressed him out this afternoon.

September scheduling is underway. Today, I worked on some session planning and program development. Just working away.:)

Finding The Voice

Hi gang,

I have survived and recharged from all of my busy activities. The Summer blitz is done and I've had the necessary time to come down from the "go go go."

Today I accompanied an old friend from high school to an audition for NBCs The Voice. I'm a big fan of the show- I think its the best singing competition on TV. All of the other shows, personally, drive me bonkers. I really feel that its about the talent and artistry of each person first- they get actual coaching from people in the music industry-- people who know what they are talking about AND although America gets to vote, the judges also have a say. I like that. And they don't show the cattle call audition process in order to make fun of the people who don't sing as well.

It was one of the more interesting experiences I have had. These people go to these auditions hoping to find their own voices, or make it big, or get that one last chance. I guess I don't really get it because I don't feel that. My life is completely different and I'm very happy with what I'm doing. I'm glad, because its sort of a nerve-wracking experience.

I'm gearing up for my fall schedule which includes creating a MT program at the school, more contracting work and piano lessons.
I've also been officially appointed to the regional music therapy association executive board. I handle continuing education opportunities and courses for the region. I am excited to get started. I have learned a lot already and there's still a lot left to discover.

Things are moving forward and now that I feel normal again I will be updating more regularly. Thanks for bearing with me here.

Goodnight

I forgot to add....

My meeting went really well on Friday.

We firmed up some details and created a timeline, so I will be starting in mid-September. Yay! It was a very positive meeting and really got my wheels turning. There's no way to know how it will all turn out or work until we get underway. But for now, there are quite a few people who are excited to get started, including me.

Tomorrow a music therapist from Argentina will be observing one of my afternoon sessions. I am looking forward to talking with her and learning more about what MT looks like in Argentina. That sound be pretty interesting.

In other news, I finished my run of Aida this afternoon. The show went smoothly and strike went well. I am sad to see another show go, but I am happy to have some much needed hibernation time (as previously noted).

The Technology Reds

The Blues have disappeared and the more triumphant reds have appeared.
My computer has miraculously come to life. The screen works again. I guess everything dried out. Thank goodness. That certainly saves a bit in my own pocketbook and helps me get my life back together. I was feeling a little frazzled and scattered.

I think the frazzled also has to do with coming down from go-go-going between weddings, shows, and festival. I am looking forward to closing the show, working tomorrow and taking a little stay-cation.

How cute is this onesie? That's what I feel like.

I'm due for some solid hibernating and recharging.

The Technology Blues

Hi all,

My computer is on the fritz here. There was an incident with an open container of liquid, a certain canine and my ability to knock things over with my butt. Please enjoy that mental image.

In the meantime, I have an elaborate set up that requires too many cords and backing up my hard drive before I send my computer in to get fixed.
But I have some exciting updates:

I have a meeting on Friday afternoon to discuss specifics about creating a music therapy program at that school in San Jose. I am absolutely excited and a little nervous. I wonder how its going to go. I'm meeting with someone different this time. This person is the education director of the school, instead of the assistant executive director. I think that's a pretty good sign. We're getting down to the nitty gritty details. I love that. I am excited to see what they have in mind and what we can come up with together.

I got a call to do another show in San Jose. So my name must be getting around. I love that too. I am going to be pretty busy with projects to play and this particular company doesn't have the budget to offer more money. The run is longer and the pay is less. Soo, I have politely declined.

My supervisor for my independent contracting work is looking at expanding my schedule again starting in September. This is also great news. Despite how I groan about having to get up early, I love working. And I love my clients and all of the people I get to see. So it looks like my schedule is starting to fill out for the fall. Its very much welcomed.

I also sent in my registration for the AMTA (American Music Therapy Assoc.) national conference in November. My co-intern, Kari, and I are going to be roomies. I can't wait to see her and I can't wait to be reunited with other music therapy friends. There will be shenanigans. I was asked to participate on a leadership panel during the conference to talk about my role as a former student president of the western region. And I just found out that my internship director will also be serving on the panel. What a hoot. I had no idea until Kari mentioned it. I had that initial reaction of "Oh man! I hope I don't do anything wrong and how embarrassing" when I found out. Man, these internship directors know too much. They knew you before you were a professional. They've seen you at your worst and at your best. I think it might take a long time for me to get over that. :)


I'm finishing out my last show for the summer this weekend and I'm looking forward to continued down time after a crazy month of July.

The Festival, the Kings Festival???

One of my favorite lines from Into the Woods.

The Garlic Festival is over and I am exhausted. We had a great festival. It seemed like there was more media coverage. We certainly did not have too many opportunities to sit down. Its nice to be busy.
I unfortunately caught a cold right before festival (from the last show I played). My voice is gone but I am feeling better. Its hard to have to communicate over all the noise and dust for three days.
I was glad to sleep in this morning and not rush through my morning cup of coffee.

After wrapping up some loose ends from the weekend, I will be picking up my god-bulldog(ter) Peaches and taking her home. I'll be staying up there for the next couple of days.

I have a meeting this week to continue talking about creating a music therapy program at that school. We keep getting closer and closer to finalizing something. Not sure what that is yet, but as soon as its official, I will let you know.

The crazy month of July is over and now onto August. I'm looking forward to the slower pace, one more show and perhaps a little stay-cation. I think I deserve it. It will give me some needed rest to spring back into the music therapy mode. :)

Make Serendipity Work for You - Mark de Rond, Adrian Moorhouse, and Matt Rogan - Harvard Business Review

Make Serendipity Work for You - Mark de Rond, Adrian Moorhouse, and Matt Rogan - Harvard Business Review


I just read an article on the Harvard Business Review blog network about serendipity. It really got my attention.

When I was in Colorado, I commented to my friend how she has been open to so many different serendipitous moments in her life. Then I came across this article this morning.

This person suggests that serendipity is a practice or a skill set that can be cultivated. Its more than just plain old luck or being at the right place at the right time. It is about seeing meaningful combinations where others do not.

This made me think about the job opportunities that I have come into in the last few months. I had been describing it as "being in the right place at the right time." But maybe it was a kick start in seeing opportunities where there appear to be "none."

I think this idea pushes the bar in innovation and creativity and it makes me kind of inspired to look at things differently. I really like that.



That's the thought for the day.

Opening Weekend

And on that note, let the firestorm that is July officially begin. I've been trying to juggling a few shows and meetings and work and a festival this month. Last night I got a little wake up call about some things I scheduled. Luckily the things happening in the next week are all ironed out. Mostly. :) Upon looking at my calendar more closely and updating everything, it really isn't so bad. I just have to keep some things straight and prep for garlic festival while still going to shows and rehearsals.

Opening weekend of THE WIZ went well. There are two shows today but I am doing my Sunday music therapy rounds, so some other person is subbing in for today. I'll be interested to know how it goes. Each player has a definite style and way of doing things. You can often tell when someone is subbing in. I'll be sad not to be down there for the show. Even though it has been frustrating, the frustrating has turned into more fun.

But today I have to switch gears into music therapy and get to my sessions!

Counting the Different(s)

I read an article on the Harvard Business Review site this morning titled "How do you know a great person when you see one?"

I think part of this article says that great leadership or greatness is often times context dependent... right? Different situations call for different skill sets. Different people will shine in different circumstances. And how many times can I use the word, "different"?

This also made me think of the different temperaments: sanguine, choleric, melancholy and phlegmatic (definitely Choleric with a melancholy secondary)... combined with the 4 letter personality type (I'm an INTJ) and all of the other personality tests and things out there that are made to be tools to understand yourself better.

I was going somewhere with this.....

Oh right. Different skill sets shine in different places. I'm having a real problem with that this week.

See, I am the type of take charge, make a spreadsheet, get it organized kind of gal - when it comes to jobs and professional matters. The organizational state of my desk and bedroom leaves a bit to be desired, although I could tell you were everything is- just don't move it. Anyhow, when it comes to things that require a product, or schedule or payment, I have learned to be more diligent and cover my bases and try not to overschedule, double book or most important over extend myself. I've learned my lesson. The hard way. And I don't really feel the need to learn it again (we'll see how this goes after the month of July).

The problem I'm having is that this person in charge of one of my summer activities is driving me bonkers because he/she uses a different leadership style.

This normally isn't a problem. We have to deal with people who do things differently every day. But I can't let go of this. As you can see.

I am having a hard time just letting this person do part of their job.... even though I (big emphasis on I) would do it in a completely different way. This person has a great skill set and its being displayed in many other ways. But something about the way things are being done is making me a little crazy on the inside.

("Different" Count is up to 10)

We need people to do things differently (#11)? Yeah.

Do I have to like it? No.

Do I have to respect it? Yeah I do. But I can do that.

Sacramento

I am back from Sacramento. I spent the weekend with a colleague/friend swapping music therapy resources and working on improvisation styles. We had a nice time and it was interesting experience to kind of outline some of the improv styles but it was fun to play and improvise together. And then of course swap stories and talk shop. I enjoyed myself.

I then drove from Sacramento and did three sessions this afternoon. I am wiped out. The sessions went well. I am noticing some changes- mostly positive- in the way some of my clients are responding to music. It reminds me that clients are always surprising and that the therapeutic relationship is constantly growing. I like that.

I have a some sessions tomorrow- plus lunch at my favorite thai place and then I am in full The Wiz- mode. We start tech rehearsals this week and open on Friday. I am really trying to remind myself to take one thing at a time and enjoy what I'm doing every day. It makes it more fun and I find I can better go with the flow that way. This month is just crazy, so the one day at a time thing is going to be really important. I am thankful to be able to do what I love every day, both music therapy and my involvement in theater. My life is pretty good right now. :)

I am exhausted. Good night!

If a Tree Falls in the Forest....

Usually that would end with "And no one is there to hear it, Does it make a sound?"

BUT I say that if a tree falls in the forest and you're the one tipping it, then it certainly does make a sound. I know because we tipped some dead trees (that were about to fall anyhow) on our hike through Golden Gate Canyon State Park, just outside of Golden, CO.

I am back from a wonderful week in Colorado. My good music therapy friend got married on Sunday and I spent the week helping out with wedding details and enjoying freshly fired s'mores on the bachelorette camping trip. I came back with zero ticks and a ton of amazing memories.

This was the view on our drive back from camping to the bride's house. Gorgeous.

There is too much to write and talk about, but I will say that I enjoyed every minute of my trip- even the stressful ones. The rest of the bridesmaids were so much fun to be around AND I was able to reconnect with my Arizona MT ladies.

There we are! Reunited at last. I hadn't seen these lovely ladies in person since moving to New York last year.

The wedding itself was beautiful. The bridesmaids wore all different shades and shapes of green and we spent the evening dancing away in the big white tent.

Here we are waiting for the bride to make her entrance

Even now I actually miss all of these people and I can't wait to take another trip to Colorado AND go camping again. I've been changed. Ha. It was a beautiful trip full of inside jokes and obnoxious camp songs and lots of love. I do feel like one of the family now.

I am in the middle of my recuperation time, as an introvert I need that alone time to recharge from a crazy crazy week. But I am prepping for the next few things in my calendar- Mainly the orchestra pits for The Wiz and Aida and the upcoming Garlic Festival.

This weekend I am headed towards Sacrament to see a music therapy colleague for an improvisation workshoppy weekend. We're just going to spend the weekend playing and I'm going to share with her some of my improvisation resources.

Also, I went off the grid for a week and that was the week my email decided to Explode with amazing things and opportunities.

- I was invited to participate in a leadership panel at the next national music therapy conference.

- I got a call to play a 5 week run of Rent at a theater in the north bay area. It pays really well, and its a show that I've wanted to play.

- Heard back from the school and we are inches away from settling a contract for the fall!

- Was asked if I'd be interested in accompanying some music lessons/teaching theory starting in the fall.

Looks like I will remain pretty busy through the end of the year. Just the way I like it.

One other important thing I discovered this past week is a hidden talent. It must run in the family.....

---------------------------------------->

That's right....

I can stack rocks in artistic ways. I feel like my uncle would be proud. This particular sculpture was my crowning achievement in the way of rock formations for the weekend.

That's it. Time for my afternoon nap. I am glad to be back in the blogosphere!

Redefining Self-ish

I'm reading Carl Roger's "On Becoming a Person." His whole thing is that therapy is based on the individual, based on potential in man rather than methodology. Obviously I have not broken into the fun summer beach books yet.

Anyhow, an interesting topic came up.

Redefining the word "Self-ish"

In one of the client excerpts this woman is going on and on about how she thought being in therapy and wanting to talk about herself is selfish. Until she realized that the word has a new and different connotation. Maybe being "self-ish" in some regards isn't always so bad. In this context the therapist summarizes what the client says and connects the dots between self-ish and discovering more about your self.

So its good to be self-ish if it means self discovery or exploration?

I've been thinking about this ever since I read that particular passage. I think its kind of a cool concept. Selfish gets a bad connotation most of the time. But in this context it is an important to vital thing towards building self-awareness, towards becoming.

I wonder what would happen if we all practiced a little more self-ishness?

Venting

Ring Ring Ring!

My phone has been getting a lot of play lately.

A couple of my music therapist friends called today regarding needing to vent about a few things, some work things and some non-work things.

I love that I am in a profession where I can call a colleague-friend and explain a situation and know that they will understand in a way that is different from someone who is not so familiar with music therapy processes.

And I am happy that I can return the favor them when needed.

I got to catch up with my co-intern today which was wonderful. We've both been so busy that we haven't had the time to truly catch each other up. It was a lovely way to spend my morning. I love the feeling of being connected and need to be reminded every now and then of the importance of reaching out to reconnect or make new connections.

Just call me the Networker... Hmm.... that might be my new super-hero personality.

Trouble Sleeping

Trouble Sleeping?

Coincidentally, also the title of a nice song.

Also the current thought going through my mind... well, one of them. Sometimes I have a difficult time turning my mind off and getting to bed. I feel physically tired, but I can not simply go to sleep. And usually, the only thing that helps is to write. I'd journal but my journal is out of reach. Instead I decided to blog and watch The Voice on hulu. Does anyone watch that show? I find it interesting.

Anyhow... anyone out there have things that help with sleeplessness?

Today I'm thinking about...

Culture.

My aunt came over last night and told me about a new show - My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding. I guess it is an interesting look at the culture of travelers. I think of, immediately, The Riches (an old series on FX). The Riches were a family of travelers. Anyhow, I guess once you get through the TLC sensationalism, the cultural part is really interesting. I'm hooked already. I think it airs Thursday nights. I'll be looking for it tonight.

(picture right off TLC's My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding---------->)

Anyhoooo, this made me think about different cultures. I remember in undergrad that part of my anthropology class focused on the homeless teens in urban environments- they are a subgroup and have a specific culture. So naturally, I started drawing ties to the profession (rather than the discipline) of music therapy. Not that music therapists walk around with bike chains wrapped in socks (known as smileys)... although..... just kidding. But I started to think about the culture, the people in it, what defines success in our field, unifying ideas/tenets/beliefs, and what kind of subgroups might exist.

So then...

I had to look up the definition of Culture.

"The arts and other manifestations of human intellectual achievement regarded collectively."

Hmmm that could work.

I haven't been apart of the profession for a long time (4 years as a student, 1 year as an intern, and now 6 months as a professional), but I feel like there are some patterns and similarities to cultural/societal systems developing - you know, in my own mind. For example, there are certain roles and titles that define where we are in our development as therapists.

Students - just barely getting to know what music therapy is! We're babies. We need education, often hand holding, a lot of advice, nurturing, tough love, strict deadlines, and seemingly impossible practicum placesments.... just to "get" it.

Internship- is sort of like an adolescence, a time for growth and development as a therapist while still under direct supervision

Professional - Adult. Experience and knowledge develop over time. There are people who remain at a bachelors level, those that go on to get a Masters or Doctorate and those that leave the field. Some teach; some research; some do. Some do two of these things. Some try to do all three. It seems that more mature therapists tend to be more involved within the organization and are there to mold and guide the younger therapists. Mature therapists step down and new therapists step in... the circle of life.

Some therapists identify more with regional groups, state groups, groups by university, groups of interns that shared the same supervisor, older MTs, younger MTs, there are MTs that identify more with their model or philosophical orientation. There are some groups that chose not to be members in the organization --- and I would say that they make a group too.

This whole organization is a complex system. It has checks and balances. It has an elected board that makes decisions on behalf of the membership. It has a code of conduct- ethical and moral standards- and standards of education and practice. The organization has one definition for music therapy with many models, techniques and paradigms underneath it.... yet sometimes, there seems to be some division... or uneasy acceptance towards those that practice in different ways or those who may chose to leave the field. As a young professional, I can't quite put my finger on it.

Sometimes, I think with any group, the differences seem to be highlighted and unity put to the back seat.... like marketing yourself. Why chose this person when I have a certification in this type of model or have completed a specific training? But we're all music therapists in the end, and I believe that we want the same things for our clients-- to promote growth and health (however that might mean for the individual) through music and a therapeutic relationship. Each therapist does it differently and I think its easy to get hung up on that. I do it ALL of the time and find I have to police myself when reading or seeing things. It takes all kinds, right? Absolutely!

This brought up a few more questions about how a culture develops and what keeps a culture alive (unified) over generations. I don't want to give away all of my thoughts--- as many of them went into my Good Idea Journal for later investigation and thought.... but it continues to be something I think about every time I see a new blog, read a thread on the music therapy listserv or compare stories with friends and colleagues (Often "Hmmm where did this person come from, where did they study, how do they practice).

Also... where do I fit in right now? I've learned a lot but still know so little about this great field. I've made it through school and internship and now I'm a new professional.... by title. But do I feel that way? Sometimes.

As you can see, I've been busy thinking over the past few days. It was more like a brainflurry instead of a brainstorm.

It sort of reminded me of working at the fair. Maybe Holly and DiAnne might agree... there are certain types of groups that make the fair happen every year. There are people you love to see every year that you work well with and there are those that are just a little more difficult to appreciate. Maybe they most identify with their department or building or "title," but at the end of the 22 days of fair you end up with a hell of a result.

This kind of stuff is everywhere. I think its pretty interesting.

I am off to Utah to spend some time with music therapy colleagues for a couple of days and I am really looking forward to it.

My Good Ideas

I come up with at least 3 great ideas every day.

Only now (well, yesterday) have I decided to start keeping track of them in my "Good Idea Journal." That in itself, I would say, is a great idea.

Idea No. 1: appreciate the things I have already accomplished.

Today is my birthday and I can't help think about the things I have accomplished as a young professional in my short 24 years and the journey I have yet to travel. I have a lot of things I want to accomplish (at least 3 ideas for different books, workshops, presentations, and curriculum.... just sayin'), but it is nice to take a step back and appreciate the things I have done. I spend a lot of time in my head... its a nice use of my time to appreciate myself. I've completed an internship, passed a board exam, moved home, increased my musicianship and my clinical musicianship, read new books and tried a bunch of new things. Pretty good.

Its nice to be able to take a step back after going and going and going for 5 years to obtain my degree and certification. The slower pace of building relationships and getting a little bit of experience has been a (mostly) welcomed change.

June brings more meetings, more sessions and a wedding. I am hoping to have more to report about the school I've been working with. I will know more after another meeting in a couple of weeks. But for now, I am going to enjoy my accomplishments and growth and my birthday cake.

Nordoff-Robbins

Just found this video on YouTube. It's worth a look!

FIND IT HERE

The Blogging World

There are a few different music therapy blogs out in the blogosphere these days. Some MTs are really trying to grab ahold of the information age and use it to their advantage- for informing public, for marketing and for advocacy.

I often stop and think about how my blog compares to the other ones out there.

I think I try to give snap shots of the things happening in my life. This blog has not taken a turn into advocacy at this time.. not to say that it won't transform over time. There are plenty of other music therapy blogs aimed at providing resources and technical information and others aimed at painting more personal pictures.

One that I stumbled upon while I was looking up other MT blog was The Mindful Music Therapist. <http://mindfulmusictherapist.blogspot.com/

I had the pleasure of sitting in on a presentation by Roia and it was amazing. I enjoyed her perspective and her ability to be completely candid. Her presentation was on taboo topics in MT- it was wonderfully uncomfortable and I learned a lot.

http://musictherapyresearchblog.com

This highlights some of the research happening right now and incorporates podcasts. I think that's pretty cool.

http://nordoff-robbinsmusictherapy.blogspot.com/

here's a blogger at the Nordoff Robbins clinic that I just found after a quick search.

There are tons of other sites out there including ones by former classmates now colleagues (http://brianna-lifesasymphonyplayyourpart.blogspot.com) and other popular figures in MT at the moment.

Kat Fulton's http://www.rhythmforgood.com/ always has something interesting on it.

If you have a quick second, its kind of fun to see what else is out there. MT is a broad field with many models and ways of doing things. Its nice to be reminded that it takes all kinds and that the number of online resources is certainly growing.

Its been fun, but now we're done

I used that as a transition song today during sessions. It seemed to work. The kids were super cute and into the music.... well as into it as you could be when there's a random stranger in the movement room with a guitar. They were precious. My little experiences worked well and I left a session plan with the director of the preschool to give her an idea of what the experiences were addressing.

I think it went well. I got some nice responses and they did well with the experiences in terms of my "expectations" or "playing rules." We'll see. As Julie pointed out, there's not much you can do about an audition. You can't change anything about it after it happens and you just do your best to prepare for it. Then you have to let it go. Soooo they will decide if they want that type of programming at their school.

Side note--- the director of the preschool was apart of my sister's high school graduating class. random.

On my way home it started to rain which is a perfect excuse to change into my sweats and pack up my stuff from Peaches' house. That's where I'm at. I feel relieved that the session is done and that they have to decide. And I'm excited to be back at home. Between my LA trip and Peaches sitting, I haven't been home since last Monday and I'm looking forward to having a couple of days of down time before another work day and my birthday. THen after my birthday, I'm off to Utah for a music therapy meeting type thing.... so I guess things don't show much sign of slowing down, but at least I love what I'm doing and what I have planned. That's the important thing.

Wednesday

My sessions are this morning!!!

I'm feeling a little nervous because I've never met any of the kids and I'm not sure how everything is going to go. I guess I'm not nervous because I doubt my ability to do a session, must nervous that there are a lot of unknowns going into it. But I think they will understand that right? I hope. I have my session plan and I've practiced some of the music and the way I'm going to try and give directions. Its going to be interesting. I either have TOO much planned or not enough. I guess I will find out.

I'll update afterwards.... well after I clean up my stuff and pack my bags (Peaches' parents come home this afternoon).

My sissy comes home for a visit on Friday! I'm very excited.

Okay. Time to look over my plan again and be zen about the whole thing.

Tuesday

Tuesday comes between Monday and Wednesday.

Monday I had a couple of sessions and I have a story.

Music Therapy Story of the Week:

I was doing a drumming group at a day program for older adults. I have clients as old as 97 in that group. In fact one of my 97 year old clients was singing harmony with me on a few songs. Anyhow, We were singing an old classic- a song that everybody knows when this other woman started making up her own verses. They were great. The fit in the structure of the song and she just kept singing them out. I changed the music a little bit to just a simple improvised chant about playing together and this woman started speaking rhythmically..... well.... rapping. She was rapping about being kind to each other, taking care of one another and that "everything will be alright." So I took some of what she was saying and put it into the chant. It was a real organic type of thing. But her rapping was amazing and the content was brilliant-- universal but also related to the previous song. Shoot. I love those moments.

Now Wednesday I am doing a session at a preschool. Its the preschool thats connected with the school I've been talking to since January. I'm doing two sessions tomorrow morning- one for each class. They are trying to figure out if MT is something they want to add into their preschool program. So the purpose is to show them that they do. :) They may not know that they want it and I have to show them that they absolutely do. Soooo I have to make sure I know what I'm doing for tomorrow. I don't think I'll feel confident about it until I actually get in there or figure out what kind of music I'm doing to do. My plan right now looks pretty good, I just need to go over it. I think I may bring copies of it to show the director--- my plans are organized by experiences (greeting, instrumental improv etc) and underneath each experience I have goals, objectives, and rationales listed. It's pretty genius if I do say so myself. Most of that is for me. I like to be clear on what I'm working towards and WHY. In case someone asks, I can straight up tell them what I was going for and if it worked or not. :)

Alright. It's also Tortilla soup Tuesday, so I'm headed down to Gilroy (I've been dogsitting my bulldogter, Peaches) for lunch and to pick up an outfit or something for tomorrow.

That be all folks. Send me happy thoughts tomorrow morning!

A Chewed up Flip Flop

I arrived at Peaches' house for a girls weekend and what did I find?

A chewed up flip flop. As you can see here, It doesn't look much like a flip flop anymore. What you can't see here are the little bits of foam and strap that were scattered all over the floor. Oops.

I felt for this flip flop. This flip flop and I are sort of kindred spirits. For just a few days ago, I felt a little like this flip flop-- sort of ragged round the edges with little pieces of my self floating around in odd places. With work, the school stuff and playing back to back shows, I hadn't a whole lot of time to put all my pieces back together. And in my recuperation time, I often worried about other things which makes recuperation time less recuper....ative.... restorative? It made me more tired. A while ago I had planned to visit friends in southern california and I decided that this trip came at the perfect time.

I got to hang with music therapy friends, observe sessions, talk shop, and babysit my friend Paolo. He's the cutest. And smartest. I got to have dinner with one of my mentors which turned out to be extremely therapeutic. I got to go out with my boys (the bassist and guitarist from the Band that I was in at the regional Conference) after observing some sessions. We ended up at this wonderful pizza place for pizza and beer. AND to make things better, it turned out to be karaoke night at this place. My friend D and I brought the house down with Up Where We Belong. It was classic. I left this morning feeling more like myself and very happy. this was just the little trip that I needed and I am thankful to have the flexibility and opportunity to take a little trip in the middle of the week.

This weekend I am hanging with Peach while I prep to do a demonstration session at the school I've been working with- I am looking forward to that. I've got my books to read and a white bulldog to keep me company. AND for dinner tonight I will be enjoying fresh greens (lettuce and spinach) from my garden. yum. I am back in action.

I have made it through the Garden

I finished my run of Secret Garden last night and it was a great show. I'm sort of sad to see it go- now that I finally got comfortable with it but it was a good experience. I feel like a better player for it.

Speaking of playing, I will be playing at the Gilroy Wine Stroll this afternoon. Hope to see you all there.

Now that my shows are done-- at least for the next two months (we'll see)--- its back to music therapy full time. I really enjoy and love being involved in shows and the money isn't bad. But its nice to return to my real thing.

I do my Sunday rounds tomorrow and then I'm off to LA on Tuesday to see some music therapy friends, observe a few sessions (hopefully) and kibbitz. I'm looking forward to it- then back right away for another few days with Peaches. ..... so I guess I'm just as busy. Oh well. Thankfully my friends all live a little north of LA, so its not like driving to Orange (where I have to go through LA). It makes the trip much shorter.

I have to get up a moving. I'm definitely going to need my coffee before even thinking about what the heck I will play for the wine stroll. I haven't had much energy in between shows and being sick to prepare for it. That always makes things interesting. :) We'll see what happens.

Feeling Better

It has been a week and I am finally feeling better.... for a couple of reasons.

1. I am feeling healthier. Most of my symptoms are gone. Although my blood pressure is up and my agita is flaring watching the Sharks game. I was flattened out for a whole week with whatever it was.

2. The Secret Garden is going well. Not as stressful as I thought it would be- even the school shows... although I was spoiled because the other keyboardist (with whom I'm splitting the run) came to play the school show for funsies. It was wonderful to have another keyboard there to even things out and create a bigger sound. It worked so well that I think (and HOPING) the musical director is going to try and get another keyboard for the rest of the school shows. please please pretty please. Keep your fingers crossed for that.

Things are moving a head for me. I'm scheduling a demonstration/pro-bono music therapy session at the preschool for the school I've been talking to and working on moving forward after submitting my references to the assistant executive director of the school. I have a few more secret garden shows and the Gilroy Wine Stroll on Saturday. Then I'm off to LA to see friends and observe a therapist or two in action. I am really looking forward to that. Plus I'll get to see my special little buddy, Paolo--- Casey's son. He'll be 1 in July. He's adorable and very advanced... must get that from his aunt lauren. ;) I told Casey I'd be up for babysitting for an afternoon or something and I'm looking forward to that.

In other news, I feel intensely proud of my friends. my best friend just did a cabaret show in ny which resulted in this youtube video I think she's pretty fierce. go team.

System on the mend

I think I've been feverish all day without really knowing it. I couldn't find a thermometer around here. I was really cold. Then I was really hot. then cold again. then hot. Anyhow, I ordered in - which was delicious- and then slept for a little bit. When I awoke, I invited peaches for some nighttime-cuddles and a movie and after that... I started feeling A LOT better. My body temp feels like its regulated and back to normal and I'm less achy. I have a little bit more pep in my step. Thank Goodness for my Bulldog Nurse Maid.

Florence Peach-engale

She is very attentive, obviously.... you know between naps and things... as long as I don't bug her. ;)

System Failure

Holy cow. I am wiped out. I guess with the down time today, my body had time to catch up... except that I caught up with some nasty bug thing or something--- scratchy and closed throat, very little voice and this afternoon added cold. I refuse to call them chills. I've done nothing today but read, watch movies and catch up on my news and emails from the past week. But man, do I feel pretty bad. I haven't even practiced yet. Yikes. Maybe I will feel up to it after dinner tonight. I'm ordering in- spaghetti and meatballs and soup. I'm quite excited about it.

That's it.

I have my work dates for the month of may- but I am also making a trip down south to see friends and observe some fellow therapists.

Also this week: Happy Birthdays Mom and Dad. xo.

I have returned...

from inner space.

Yes, the run of Starmites has concluded. The lines from the finale of the show say it all, "it wasn't a dream; no it wasn't a dream. it was magic, but it wasn't a dream." There some wonderful memories and moments from this very long weekend. Every time I do a show, I feel lucky to have been able to be apart of the whole process.

here's a picture of my home for the past week. my little music stand and my light and to the right of the conductor. That pit is dusty and dry. Whenever I play I go through a tube of chapstick because my lips (especially- for some reason) get really dry. Not that you needed to know that.

The show was great fun. But, I am also exhausted in every way. My body hurts from sitting in a pit all week long, my muscles are tight, fingertips and wrists a little achy and my brain is just about ready to shut off for a couple of days --- you know before the next thing. But it was all worth it.... Worth it for the kids and feeling their sense of accomplishment after nailing the show and bringing down the house and worth it for building relationships with the other musicians in the pit. If you could really see what we do down there between scenes--- well, you'd figure out why they put the musicians below the stage. :) We're a little rowdy. AND after seeing/hearing the show so many times, we also develop our own lines, choreography and rituals.

Also, as you can see, musicians can get injured on the job. ;) I was running something with the cast this afternoon

and I looked down and I was bleeding. Epic, right? Its actually just a small cut. I guess I was really into the moment. I'm not quite sure how it actually happened. :) I suppose that's how I go about all of my business- go big or go home. I leave a little bit of my passion, and heart, and spirit behind---- but I think in this case, the kids in the show do too. AND they can feel when you do that- when you put in the extra effort for them.

I love working with the kids and supporting them in that way. At this age, 8-14 years old, they are in it for the fun. Some of the older kids from the next production came to the show this weekend and sang a song from their show during intermission. It actually made me kind of mad. I didn't think it was appropriate promotion of their show. Coming to show should be about supporting the kids in it, rather than plugging your own thing-- in my opinion. I didn't appreciate that. And they were a little obnoxious and telling me they were excited for me .. "We're so excited for you guys"....... like we should be excited to play for you? or excited to play the score? (which in some cases is more of a pain than exciting) It rubbed me the wrong way.

I'll stick to the younger kids. With that said, I have a couple of days off before filling in for some shows for the older kids. I'll be playing in the pit for The Secret Garden for a couple of shows the next two weekends.

But now- I am exhausted and will not be playing any piano tonight... maybe not until tomorrow night. I do need to practice for The Secret Garden. I will be flying solo (the only keyboard) for the school shows and this is one of the hardest (if not THE hardest) score I have ever played. I want to feel prepared. But there's only so much I can do and practicing now would just be stupid. :)

So I will be stretching everything out, heating up my rice bag and crawling into bed.

Thanks for being patient in-between blog posts!

Music Therapy Story of the Week

I'm pretty hungry for lunch, so this post may be brief.

I wanted to share something that happened in my session yesterday.

Yesterday, one of my clients was preoccupied with something that I had happened earlier in the week. At one point in the session, I offered this person the chance to play the piano. Usually in this type of experience, I provide some sort of musical structure and this person needs a lot of encouragement to play. This time, this person got up out of their seat and sat down directly next to me at the little keyboard I use and started to play! We used some of the phrases about this event that happened earlier in the week and it unfolded into a song. When asked about how this event made this person feel, they were able to express that. It was a entire new experience for this person. I was sort of amazed right there in the session. It seemed like this person was able to express exactly how they felt in the moment in a new and meaningful way.

Anyhow, I'm totally jazzed about it.

Tonight marks the first (and only) rehearsal for Starmites! My keyboard is programmed and almost packed up and ready to go. I am looking forward to it!

Meeting No. 1305-283467834910348

My meeting went extremely well today!

In fact it went so well that I am at the point of gathering my references to submit. Seems pretty encouraging eh?

I'm beyond excited.

Except I just realized that I sent an email to the people I'm asking for references before asking if the facility wants a written letter or contact information. I feel like a stupid head AND I hate to think that I'm going to have to write my ITD again and be like, "oops... did a lauren thing, got ahead of myself and now they want a letter." I still feel like I have to do everything perfectly the first time out, especially when it comes to checking in and updating my internship people. I'm trying not to fixate

and instead I'm trying to remember how excited I am to be moving forward once again!!!! Although it felt like meeting no. 1305-283467834910348, this whole process has taken relatively no time at all. I'm thankful for that. The next few months are going to be really exciting.

That's the update!

An Update to the update: the reference thing has been cleared up and we're golden--- feeling good!

Dear America,

Please do yourself a favor and google "classical" music. I guarantee you'd find more valuable information there than watching tonight's "Classical" Night on Dancing with the Stars.

Love,

A Disgruntled Musician

-------------------------

This is ridiculous. And I can't stop watching it because I want to see what other piece they botch and mess up next. It makes me sad that perhaps some people will be experiencing (what they are calling) classical music for the first time through this display of crazy.

That's all I really wanted to say.

NORM!!!

When Norm walked into Cheers everybody yelled "NORM!" He was a regular.

I had my own norm moment today when I walked into the Thai restaurant that I LOVE. I go to this place every monday that I work in Union City. Today I walked in and the woman who owns the place said, "oooh! You're back!" Yep. I think that qualifies as a Norm moment.

I had some great sessions the past two days. Work continues to be satisfying and fulfilling.

But really, my focus right now is tomorrow's meeting. And really.... I mean, I'm going in there with my ideas and questions and seeing what happens. Maggie and I decided that really, that's all I need to do. I do feel empty handed, like I should be walking in with a program already planned. But the program can't be designed without hearing what the facility wants. I'm getting ahead of myself.

So... as I have been doing each time I walk into this place, I have two sets of hopes:

realistic hope: I am going to walk out with a better idea of what they are looking for in a program AND schedule another meeting to continue talking about it.

reaching hope: I am going to walk out with a job. Don't know what it will look like (contract, part/full time [could you imagine!?]) but it will be a job.

I'd be happy just getting another meeting and continuing the dialogue. We will see what happens!

Send some nice ju-ju!

Digesting

I realize that last post on conference had a lot of things in there to digest. For me too!

In thinking about all of this stuff, I realize that I am in the right field and that I really have the best job for me. The people in this profession are incredible and I come away feeling lucky to be included in such a group. There are things and people that drive me crazy, but at the end of the day it feels like any other family. And I am thankful for that. I just started and have my entire professional career to achieve my own greatness. Between you and me, sometimes I have these experiences where I am sort of above and able to see the opportunities and potentials that can come out of this moment.... like I can see exactly what the possibilities are from a single moment. Just sometimes. I leave those moments feeling like I am meant for great great things. Thats how I felt leaving conference this time.

I had a great conversation with one of the professionals who sat on the regional board while I was student president. I went up to her to thank her for her service to the region. She's been an outstanding leader in a few tumultuous years.

Anyhow, I wanted to thank her. She's meant a lot to me in the past year or so. We had a nice moment where she explained that part of her job involves making snap assessments of her clients- their strengths and weaknesses. She went on to sort of reveal some of the things she sees for me in the future. It was one of those moments. In fact it was a lovely moment. We both got a little teary.

Everything makes me excited for the future and all of the immediate and longterm projects in the works. Just gotta keep my priorities straight. :)

Anyhow, I have had sufficient time to get unpacked, decompress, read new books and get a little sun time into my schedule.

So some of the things I am taking my newly replenished energy and enthusiasm are:

• My follow up meeting at the school next week! I am very excited to see how this progresses.
• Another children's theater production at the end of April
• Another children's theater production at the beginning of May (Just got the call this week!)
• A trip down to observe a friend of mine work and of course to get together to play music with them! I can't wait. We're going to swap improvisation idioms and techniques. Can't wait to play.

A word about that- I find the only way to further my music skills and therefore to grow as a therapist (to provide more challenging and interesting music experience) is to keep playing and trying new things. Playing with people pushes me there. Loving that.

There are a lot of things to be excited about!

Conference

Good Grief.

I have a lot of report. It has now been an entire week since my conference and I feel like I am back in the swing of things. Going to conference is like being sucked into another time-space continuum. The days go faster and slower than the rest of reality; brain power is used differently, no time for naps and celebrating at the bar every night.

Its probably one of my most favorite events of the year. :) Not because we party every night, or get to see people present on topics, but because its one of the only times during the year that I get to see and connect with my friends in the profession. We stay up late because there is so much to catch up on and we literally laugh until it hurts. Last year if you recall, I had to do like four updates on the Las Vegas Conference and while I could easily match that this year, I'll try to keep it brief. I will say that this was a big conference for me- my first as a real MT-BC professional. I feel like I'm existing on a whole new playing field.

I started my trip out right- I stopped by Casey's for some lunch and to visit with her 8 month old. I call him Pao. He's sort of like my nephew/godson (unofficially)-- they refer to me as Auntie Lauren which makes me very happy. I don't know how else to refer to him. Anyhow. Had a great lunch with her and then met up with my roommate from Chapman for dinner aboard the Queen Mary. I don't get to see these people very often and I was thankful that the scheduling worked out. I wouldn't have gotten through my southern california years without them.

Wednesday-Thursday I attended an Institute (worth 15 continuing ed credits!) taught by one of the foremost therapist practicing in the Nordoff-Robbins model. He's written a boat load, has immense clinical experience and is an amazing improviser. Whoa. The institute was amazing- a 2 day intensive where we learned about theory, watched videos and excerpts, and played. We played and played. I learned quite a few new things and styles of improvising that I can't wait to practice and implement. We got to have dinner with this therapist ( me, my boys V and D, Helen, one of my professors from ASU and another professional I know from the area). It was great just to spend time. We laughed and laughed. Now V. and D. took the institute with me and participated in this opening session thing. Anyhow, the institute really opened my eyes. I felt like I was done with conference. It was pretty mind blowing. And The therapist has now encouraged me to check out their NY training program!!! WOOOO. Such a compliment.

Thursday night was the opening session. V., D., and I were apart of the sizzling house band. The opening session was a mock "Tonight Show" where the keynote gave her speech in the form of an interview. Well every Tonight Show needs a band. The Conference Chair/EmCee reigned in us (V.D. and I) and this percussionist, who happens to be bald and resembles (slightly) Paul Shaffer, to be our leader. We had keys, drums, bass and guitar. We did a bunch of Rock anthems (our theme was Rock the High C's) and it was a blast. At the last minute, I ended up doing almost all of the vocals along with D. which was unexpected. But amazing. In fact, we rocked so hard that I split my shirt open at the seams. Literally. I discovered a HUGE rip after the show. I haven't had that much fun playing (and SINGING no less) in a long while. That is how V. and D. became "my boys." I'm planning a trip down in May to visit and observe V. in clinical action and of course to play a little bit.

Following opening session, the therapist from the institute felt like jamming- so we went to the next room and played and played until we were literally shut down by hotel management. What a blast.

Sessions started Friday. I went to quite a few. A lot of them were eye opening and interesting. I will have the notes from those sessions forever, but I prefer to reflect on all the networking I did and all of the fun I had. Friday night there was a drum circle which was a lot of fun followed by going out to dinner. I spent time with some professionals from the board last year. They have years of clinical experience and it feels like they have taken me under their wing. I appreciate all of their advice and input and really feel like they have my best interests. I've learned a lot from them. We also laughed so hard that my sides were aching and that tears were streaming. Good grief. So fun.

Saturday I attended a session given by the current AMTA (national association) President. -- that's important to note for Sunday's story. Anyhow- Saturday evening was the actual end of conference. To close there was a chant circle- a western region staple. The people who run it are all from the western region. That was fun. Immediately following that, my friends had to attend a board meeting (I'm not on the board, so I didn't go of course) but I waited in the piano bar. I made a lot of new friends. A lady turning 70 who was really sassy, a tipsy 45 year old man who was hitting hard on the piano lady, and Leslie, the salty barkeep. She was great and she also made tasty drinks. I had a few hours to kill. We requested songs - the best being Can't Smile Without You-- and sang along. Then they invited me to play a tune. So I played a little something on the piano---- WELL. Turns out that the piano is the original piano on the Queen Mary. What does that mean? It means that Lauren Bevilacqua and Liberace have now played the same piano.

WHAT? Yep. That's right.

Sunday was the student conference. I was scheduled to present my case study in the afternoon- the last session before closing. It started at 8am. I wanted to shoot myself in the face it was so early. Plus all the going to bed late and getting up early made it that much harder to get up Sunday morning. But we (a friend of mine who is on the regional board again A. and the immediate past president P.) decided to do opening session and then go to breakfast. While at breakfast the AMTA president sat down with us. She recognized me from her presentation the day before. P. started talking about when I was student president and how "we have to keep our eye on her" kind of stuff- lovely things. The AMTA President then asked if I'd be interested in being on a panel about leadership at the national conference. Whoa! Another great opportunity. I told her I was interested and gave her my card for some more information.

My presentation went well too! The people attending really got into the video clips. It felt good.

I hopped down to SD to check out Holly's Diner in person and to have dinner with Holly and another friend from the fair. It was fabulous! My brain was fried from everything that happened and I'm sure I went on forever trying to explain to Holly all the music therapy stuff. It was wonderful to see them both.

Made it home monday and spent the last two days on a vacation. I need a vacation from my vacation. :)

Over all... this was a wonderful thing for me. It had reenergized me and helped me reconnect to old friends and make new friends. It's given me a lot of think about. Its resulted in a couple of trips to observe a few other professionals. It was fun. It brought it back to the music for me. I love that.

I'm feeling ready for my upcoming meeting at the school, fired up even.

So now I continue recuperating and unpacking and gearing up for the next few big things!